A cellist at a church gig told me, “time stops for no one, it knows only one path - forward." It’s true - in music, time only knows one direction - forward. And time, once the song starts, doesn’t brake for anybody. The song, and show, must go on. Singers, much to the chagrin of accompanists, like to do what is called “back phrasing” - they like to sing in a way that messes with time. If you listen to jazz or R&B - pick a singer from those genres and they’re probably doing it. Great singers know they do back phrase, they’re unapologetic about it, and they are direct in telling their back up bands - “hey, I back phrase this, don’t get me shit about it, if you want to change it, you sing the song.” I respect that.Why back phrasing? Why singers? Because we all back phrase. I (swallowing all of my pride) back phrase. I, like you, have moments where I get behind, or where I might want to get behind a bit. It’s okay! We all do it. We must be like great singers though. We must communicate to others, “hey, my route might be a bit off.. but it’s okay, I got this.”The people that accompany you in life will appreciate you for it. As Cellist Mike says, “forward.”

When you are leading and responsible for the work of others, your approach matters.Some leaders like to command and control - and that can work.I prefer to lead like musician… creatively.Instead of asking, “may I offer feedback?” or asking “well, what do you think you should do?“I like to ask questions like:Why did this idea or effort fail? Why do you think it worked?What if we could take what we’ve learned from this failure/win and try a revised approach? How might we do that? What it wold it mean for us and our customer to get this right?In this failure, what went right? How might we capitalize on what we know works?Are we failing differently each time? Or are being insane?And here’s the thing, you can ask these questions of yourself, too. Great leaders not only are effective at leading others, they effectively self-lead themselves.

Sometimes I make yogurt to remind myself that I can.It feels good to know that I have acquired knowledge of how to turn a simple ingredient into a new product that I can use. Find an activity that reminds you that you can make things - food, yogurt, bread, wood working, a garden, a blog entry, or a friend. Recipe for yogurt:Heat milk (I use raw milk) to 90C stirring often;Take milk off the heat and let it cool to 35-40C;(While milk is cooling) Set aside 1 cup of kefir for every 2 gallons of milk.Once milk has cooled, mix the kefir with the milk and give it a good stir. Put that container (I use a big stock pot), in the oven with the light on and leave it there overnight (no heat). The next morning, enjoy yogurt. If you want it firmer, put it to the refrigerator. Note: The longer you let the yogurt incubate the more sour your yogurt will become. Kefir yogurt almost never goes bad!

“A very large part of the rancor of political and social strife springs from the fact that different classes or sections are so cut off from each other that neither appreciates the other’s passions, prejudices, and, indeed, point of view.” - Theodore RooseveltWhen stresses on the community are real, it’s easy to blame others and get angry at “the enemy.“Anger is easy; empathy is hard.We need love - and love in the form of empathy.What if we remember that…What directly hurts one indirectly hurts all;We’ve been through this before - past is prologue - and it will happen again;On the whole, people are really trying to do their best - a very small group of people sets out to be evil;Reality is perception - it’s how we choose to see things;The present is all we have - and it’s what we stand to lose?Dr. Martin Luther King offers a parting thought:“Let us all hope that the dark clouds of [prejudice] will soon pass away and the deep fog of misunderstanding will be lifted from our fear drenched communities, and in some not too distant tomorrow the radiant stars of love and [community] will shine over [us] with all their scintillating beauty.” - Dr. Martin Luther King(Adapted from Dr. King’s Letter from Birmingham Jail to reflect a broader hope and to be more inclusive. You can read the full letter here.)

I’m re-reading Doris Kearns Goodwin’s “Leadership in Turbulent Times,” a book that studies the leadership of Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, Franklin D. Roosevelt, and Lyndon B. Johnson.I realized that all 4 of these leaders had these 9 things in common.Childlike wonder and curiosity about life, people, and their stories.Connection with people they seek to serve.Thirst for knowledge of the past - poems, literature, history, fables.Doubt - crippling self-doubt and anxiety in their own ability and pursuits.Courage to decide and act - even if it was not in accordance with the norm.Entertainer - could regale audiences with stories.Pride - often had too much of it and needed an event to back it down.Vision - knew where they wanted to go.Parents - their parents left a mark of what to do and what not to do.Which ones most resonate with you?

If you’re going to start something, it requires a few things:A mission, cause, or belief that’s compelling.A runway to start - it can be small, but you need to have the space.A decision to do it.A follow through.That’s it.If it’s that easy, why is it so hard?

“The important thing about telling everyone your idea is that it puts you on the hook for following through, because you’re going to look foolish if you do nothing.” - Sam PottAt a point in life I wanted to be an architect - I was beyond fascinated with Frank Lloyd Wright. I would ask my parents for a sketch pad and colored pencils and create drawings and landscapes for “future” homes. I can vividly recall a time when I shared an idea with my mom. It went something like this:Me: “Mommy, looks at this cool idea for a house!”Mom: “Nice. How are you going to run power? How are you going to do the plumbing? How will the doors open?” Putting your ideas out there is the surest way to find what works and what doesn’t, and a good “How” question bridges the gap between idea and reality. If there is a problem with putting your ideas out there, it won’t be in the response from others. The problem will lie within you - and your ability to allow yourself to be put on the hook. Don’t shy away from that feeling; advance!

I keep my kindergarten diploma in my office because it reminds me that a key part of life is “playing well with others in the sandbox.“In the sandbox, anything can happen. Experiments, questioning, evaluating, risk-taking, or invention. It is the space where we can embody a question, a “What If.“The thing with answering questions, it’s always better when someone wants to come alongside and answer those questions with us. Perhaps they’re just as interested as you?If that’s the case, it’s best to pursue questions with others who are just as interested as but totally different than you. Why?Because difference is a competitive advantage - examining the same problem from multiple points of view likely leads to a more effective solution.That sounds simple enough. But what makes playing the sandbox with others so difficult?You are required to show your work, share the process, and share the solution.

Your ideas need space to work themselves out - John Seely Brown said, “For imagination to flourish there must be opportunity”- and that opportunity is space and time.Give yourself the problem to solve. Analyze it. Ask Why, How, and What If questions.Take yourself out for a walk. Think about those questions while walking. Play with the idea the way a cat plays with their food.Re-approach the problem later in the day and see if you’re problem solving has improved.I make an effort to take walks in the middle of the day - when the day is brightest. Perhaps giving myself time to think is the “brightest” part of the day. Pun intended.

“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed, is more important than any other one thing.” - Abraham LincolnWhat are you resolved to do? For whom? Why? What’s in it for them?There was a time when my life’s resolution was to make a living exclusively playing music, and I did it. I reached that goal at great cost to myself and my relationships, but those that doubted I could make it happen were proven wrong. That’s the problem.The problem is not those that doubted me - it was their mistake to doubt. My mistake was leveraging my ambition to serve myself - not to serve others.Any type of leadership (self, group, political, team, musical, etc.) requires demands that you serve others. Your definition of success must be rooted in the betterment of those you seek to serve.Keep your resolutions front and center - almost more important than any other one thing; the ones you seek to serve, they are your most important.