How might we develop more confidence answering “I don’t know”? How do we get by the fear of looking ill-informed? Perhaps it’s a matter of engineering a better sentence:“I am not certain. I still need to answer this question…. am I looking at this the right way?”Transform “I don’t know” into a strategic and well-laid ask for help.
It’s important to have trusted and competent people in your life. People that can offer advice, engage in your ideas, and make recommendations for you to consider. But if what if there was a proxy for a person? I know people that depend on the news and other forms of media for staying updated on events. What’s important to keep in mind is that these input sources are often free to you. And if something is free, it’s likely you that are the product. For example, if I sold advertising to this blog you would see advertisements when you visit. The blog is free to you and advertisers pay me for showing their ads to you. You become the product. Note: I don’t and won’t sell you advertising on this blog.Another example, let’s say you watch your favorite news source on YouTube. You might see ads via YouTube, because that’s how Google/Alphabet earns. You might also see news and ideas that incentivize you to keep watching and watch more. Perhaps you hear ideas that align with your ideas. Perhaps you hear news that stokes fear and creates anxiety causing you to want to find out more. Watch time increases, viewership increases, advertising revenue increases. You become the product. A good input is an insight — the smallest unit of truth that is actionable.Who are the people and what are the channels that deliver you the smallest units of actionable truth?
They often blow up in your face.
Mitigate the surprise and the stress by imagining everything that could go wrong BEFORE you actually set your plan into action.
Plan for your failure.
Interestingly, I think the more you mindfully and healthily plan for your failure, the more likely you might win.
As my Dad says:
“Prior planning prevents piss poor performance.”
A candidate and I discussed creativity.The candidate believes they are not creative — they don’t have “artistic” talent. I asked the candidate if they could design the ideal cookie. I got the benefit of imagining a potentially amazing cookie.The candidate got the benefit of realizing that creativity is not just an “arts” thing, it’s just a simple act of imagining “what if” and “how might I.”Creativity is not reserved for the artists and hipsters.
The person that is ultra-reactionary doesn’t deserve necessarily deserve your stress and attention.Acting like water — going with the flow, adapting to the environment, being persistent, being cool — is often the best response to fire.
Stressful day. But amazing how relaxing it can be to help someone else. I don’t think it was the act of “helping”. I think it was the decision that I was going to “show up” as the helper. It’s never about the destination. It’s always about who you decide to be when you arrive. I decided to be someone that was focused on the person I intended to help. I showed up that way.
I’m traveling overseas this week. While away I’ll be working and writing — it shouldn’t feel any different for you. While preparing I had a brief freak out. I told myself, “it’s okay, we got this, and chill the #!@# out.”Surprisingly, that worked.
Machiavelli writes that a prince should avoid founding their state on the people — avoid creating an organization for people by people. I think that’s because people are self-interested. I am watching “Game of Thrones” now. I imagine if Machiavelli would write a television series, “Game of Thrones” would likely be it. I enjoy seeing concepts from “The Prince” played out in that fictional world. I’m at a point in the show where Daenerys Targaryen is establishing her state. She has a belief in a state for and of free people — where slavery doesn’t exist. Daenerys doesn’t listen to her council, founds her state on the people, she ignores the effectual truth in favor of her ideals, and struggles. Why? People are largely self-interested.What are the implications for the savvy leader?Build upon an idea. Spread the idea and discover those that want to opt-in to the change you want to make.Exclude. There are people who are not meant for your work, they don’t belong in your “state.” Remove them. Recruit and lead. You don’t need to have dragons to create compliance. If you’re skilled, inspire people to want to build upon your idea and make it better. Punishments rarely make work better. Balance ideals with realism. See the world as it is, not as you hope it to be. If you want to make change happen, you must deal with what’s in front of you. I know of one leader, and reader of this blog, that sees the world as it is. She’s got a great idea to connect aging populations with experiences they want, and she gets people. She’s an effective idealist.
More than a decade ago, I sailed on the m/s Zaandam and met a fascinating woman named Veronika. Veronika worked in the shops. A well-read woman, I would often see her sitting in the passenger cafeteria on sea days with a book and a tea. We were friends, and one day I sat down and asked about the book. More than a decade later, I now own my own copy of “The Master and Margarita”, by Mikhail Bulgakov. I started reading a few pages and I’m hooked. I enjoy the descriptions of Moscow, the language used, and Bulgakov’s wit. I don’t often read fiction; and I’m glad I’m starting.
If you’re vacationing to get away from it all because life is stressful, what good is the vacation if you arrive at your destination still stressed?It’s not the distance from the problem that matters; it’s how you manage yourself.