Obviously I am not a nerd. Because would a nerd try to launch their own virtual server, program it from scratch, and spend nearly an entire week trying to figure it out?Once upon a time, I was a computer geek. I knew a bit about programming, how to make websites, and how to get clients to make websites for. At that time I attended an all boy high school. Piano and music were something I did to please my mom. And then one day, I met a girl while playing a church musical.I never looked back at the computers.20 some years later, I want to get back into it. It’s not that I am interested in computers. What interests me is being able to do something for myself. It’s why I enjoy cooking, making bread, writing this blog, and playing music.Perhaps 20 years from now, I will look back at my life and think: “Wow, I learned how to craft lots of things that were helpful to others. I wonder what’s still out there to learn?”
My friend went to the grocery store and purchased meats, desserts, and all sorts of snacks for the party. His family from out-of-town visited and planned to stop over to watch the game. My friend cooked, set out the snacks, and prepared the house. And then at the last minute, everybody canceled.My friend never received a commitment that his family would stop over. Nobody knew that my friend prepared a spread. My friend expected all these things to happen because “family should stop over.“Should my friend expect so much from his family? Should his family expect so much of him?I am concerned that we unfairly expect too much from others. I wonder if we serve ourselves better by expecting little to nothing from others. If we expect less, don’t we give ourselves the ability to be surprised by people?I have a working theory: lower expectations of others leads to higher rates of accepting people as they are; higher rates of acceptance leads to stronger bonds.
The service attendee directed me to sit in the visitor’s lounge while my car received an update. I sat in a dark grey leather chair — slightly oversized for me. I pulled out a book and began to read.I first began to notice NBC news on the first television. An anchor with a loud pink suit speaking loudly about something. Another anchor joined in. They spoke with the excitement of someone surprised that their friends threw a birthday party for them. “You guyyysssss!”On the other television a father responded to interview questions about his daughter. I think his daughter participated in a Zack Brown camp. That must be why the interviewer spoke to Zack next. Both televisions were loud, but could not compete against the voices in the repair bay adjacent to the visiting room. Men yelling back and forth at each other. Metal clanging against metal. The two television sets, the men, and the metal were defeated by two competing background music (BGM) systems. One channel for the visitor lounge, the other for the sales floor. The dealership’s open floor plan meant there was no separation between the sales floor and the lounge. Why were two channels of BGM being sent to the same space?Why did the music beat the men and metal? Why did the men and metal beat the televisions?Why did my book lose?
People using airports are usually boarding or leaving planes. These people are voyagers.The experienced voyager knows that the person they left as will not be the same person that returns. They will shed the baggage of their old self to be ready for the dangers, cultures, and fortunate that awaits them.When the voyager returns home they are forever changed. The experiences and trials they endured reshaped how they see the world. They embrace the loved ones they left behind. It’s a deep embrace - “I thought I would never see you again.If you want to be a skilled voyager, you must learn to accept the death of the past, embrace the present, and look forward to the future.Even if you encounter rough air this week, I hope you’ll welcome the turbulence with open arms. I’ll see you in the terminal.
If you want to be a runner, run.If you want to be a writer, write.If you want to be a pianist, practice piano. And,If you want to walk peacefully into the new week, breathe and walk.
David Bowie once said:
“If you feel safe in the area that you’re working in, you’re not working in the right area. Always go a little further into the water than you feel you’re capable of being in. Go a little bit out of your depth, and when you don’t feel that your feet are quite touching the bottom, you’re just about in the right place to do something exciting.”
All natural things end.Because everything in our world eventually ends, we should beware of things that appear too unnatural – too good to be true.“Do this one thing like me and you can get 5000 leads per month.““Your contract doesn’t allow you to book gigs independently of me for 2 years.““Our terms and conditions say you have to fill this form in triplicate in order to get a specialist on the line with you to talk about your desire to end your subscription…“I still remember that one customer, years ago, that launched expletives at a decibel level that dogs can’t even understand when they heard what sounded like that last bullet point.
How might band websites show us better ways to communicate with those we seek to serve?I analyzed the copy of 3 wedding band websites this week. I discovered that bands, like many of us, aren’t writing for their readers.“We play all of your favorite hits” – all of them?“We work with only the best” – my nephew is the best, do you work with him?“We love collaborating with brides” – sure.Job seekers aren’t much different.“I lead cross-functional teams that drive revenue” – so you collaborate well?“I employ listening and empathy to drive renewals” – you’re a human?“I hold teams accountable to key KPIs that drive leading results” – ok.What if we started communicating in terms our readers understand?Some ideas for musicians:“We sound like the love child of a Harley and your Ford F-150,““Our music is for people who romanticize enjoying sunsets in Tuscany with their loved ones and a chianti served in rustic stemware.““We only play music that is guaranteed to piss off your parents and your parent-in-laws… obviously that’s jazz.“Ideas for the job seeker:“Firms that love me, love me because I make people problems go away.““I ask questions that cause customers to get out of their own way.““I discover where people find value, and I help them get it.“This entry is at the unhealthy intersection of contrary, the proverbial rabbit’s hole, practicality, and the absurd.
Inexperienced music enthusiasts revere artists that demonstrate speed and bravado – as if there was an award for most notes played.Connoisseurs know that the best artists say more with less.How might we apply the wisdom of the connoisseur in all that we do?
In the past, I often associated Machiavelli with the phrase “the ends justify the means.” After re-reading “The Prince” I don’t get that message. Here’s how I imagine Machiavelli would re-write “The Prince” for you:What happens in life is neither good nor bad. History and those impacted by your behavior will judge you as good or bad. You must be willing to help or hurt others as situations require. Your ability to properly decide on a course of action is entirely tied to you seeing the world as it is not as you wish it to be.Your best defense against those who would hurt you are the allies and friends you cultivate. Create allies by helping people pursue their interests and create value. Life is going to lay traps for you — plan for them. People are going to hurt your friends and family — defend them.Winning isn’t winning if you had to burn down Rome to make it happen. Ultimately, people perceptions of your actions towards them will cause them to judge you good or bad. Carefully choose your actions. Willingly accept and live with the fate of whatever means you choose to reach your end. I don’t see a power hungry scorched earth manifesto there. Do you? I see a plea to take accountability, weigh the consequences of potential actions, and welcome the opportunities created by fate and fortune with open arms.