Potholes

Dear Milwaukee elected official,In 2020, I wrote a post about how Milwaukee could re-think parking tickets — read more here. Instead of my original idea, what if a parking ticket now read, “Congratulations, you just took one more pothole off the street?” If you adopt my idea you get 3 benefits right off the bat:Increase likelihood of parking tickets getting paid (we’re getting sick of the potholes); andLess potholes; and You, elected official, secure your re-election — because you got rid of the potholes.I hope this very unsolicited letter and its sweeping generalizations finds you well.David … Concerned citizen.… if only it was that easy to make change happen.

2023-05-04    
Cultivating allies

You are a new leader on a team. You are responsible for making change happen, and your team will resist the change. How do you proceed? Cultivate an ally.How do you cultivate an ally?Propaganda. Create a message and promulgate that message to your team. You may alienate some people that are likely not good long-term fits — you accept that risk. You hope that your message resonates with a potential change champion. Listening Campaign. Ask your team questions like What’s not working? What’s working? What’s getting in your way? What would you change? Though listening campaigns are effective, you could encounter listening traps. Mitigate the risk of traps with Option 3.Listening + Remaining Silent. Ask the question from step 2 and refuse to answer questions about your vision posed to you by the team. Every time I use this option, I cultivate a champion and effective change occurs. Why?Because you and I want to work with and for people who listen. That means we look for people who ask insightful questions and reflect back what they hear us say. But that’s not all. A great listener humbles themselves before the person they are talking to. They say I wish I could share, but I don’t know enough yet to have a strong opinion. I’m going to continue learning from you when their team asks for their vision of the future. Imagine how powerful an experience it would be to work for that kind of person. How quickly would you want to help that person? How quickly would you share with others, finally, someone who cares about us? Options 1 and 2 can work, I have seen them work with mixed outcomes. But, I am always effective at creating allies and results when I use option 3. People change when they believe the change benefits them.There’s always a benefit engaging with and giving efficacy to the stories and views of others. An effective way to give that efficacy is to humble yourself and learn from those in your charge.

2023-05-03    
When the odds are against you.

When you feel the odds are against you.Re-affirm your beliefs about yourself and the change only you can make.Understand your situation. Find the best footing possible.Master the situation. Advance.Re-assess.

2023-05-02    
Master the situation

You don’t need to worry about mastering life. You only need to focus on mastering situations life throws at you.

2023-05-01    
Eggshells

Do you hate the feeling of walking on eggshells around people? You and I meet people that we feel especially sensitive to — people we don’t want to offend or upset. We adapt to these people by “walking on eggshells”. We need to stop out of respect for those people. The people you are adapting to are telling themselves a story about themselves that is just as beautiful and just as complicated as the one you tell yourself about you. Do you want people to feel like they have to be extra careful around you? Perhaps you do; I don’t.Instead of reading someone as sensitive, I prefer to check in. “Hey, checking in, how are things going today?” Then, I can use that person’s answer to decide my next step. Perhaps they need a hug? Maybe they’re having a bad day, and just needed to get it off their chest? Maybe I misread them? The eggshells likely don’t exist. Instead, it’s possible that what we think are eggshells are the fears of being vulnerable with others.

2023-04-30    
Opening night

I’m writing this post on opening night of a show I’m working on.Opening nights are the best because it’s when every piece of production comes together to do the thing and serve those came to be served.What if our life could be a life of opening nights?What if our work could be about bringing all kinds of people together to make the thing? Opening nights are exciting because you hope the work you did in preparation puts you in a position to best entertain your audience. The reward comes from the gasps, tears, laughter, and applause of people who were moved by your work. I want my life to be a life of opening nights - in and out of the theater.

2023-04-29    
Embrace adversity.

I’m reading “Muppets in Moscow: The Unexpected Crazy True Story of Making ‘Sesame Street’ in Russia” now. I am most impressed by Natasha Rogoff’s transparency.Natasha describes the anxiety of living with decisions amidst great uncertainty. Was her new investor a criminal? Would her producer be alive tomorrow? What’s real and what’s not? Would she lose her job for making a bad decision?You and I are like Natasha.When faced with frightening decisions, it’s not the act of deciding that paralyzes us. It is the unknown debt and effects of our actions that cause us stress.You and I can be more like Natasha.Natasha did not tell herself to “grow up” or develop a “stiff upper lip.” She made uncertainty her advantage and not her liability. She also combatted her self-doubt with self-care and self-love.No matter where we are now – looking for jobs, looking for fulfillment, seeking meaning… we must advance towards the unknown, accept that it might suck, and take care of ourselves along the way.Want to learn more about the book?

2023-04-28    
You are going to be okay.

The most re-assuring words ever said to me: “you’re going to be okay."‘If you are like me, your life’s story includes moments of stress, confusion, and discontent. If you are like me, you wish for some type of relief during times like that. “You’re going to be okay” said by someone who cares about you provides that relief.Effective leaders, caregivers, and humans make bad situations better. They do this by re-assuring the humans in their charge that “they are going to be okay.”

2023-04-27    
Celebrating the pessimist.

There are some that embark on a journey filled with optimism. They share their endeavor with everyone who will listen. These explorers ask for insights and guidance from others who might have made the journey or know something about the destination. Good explorers know that their best advice could come from the pessimists — the people who see the downside. Why? Because the pessimists offer a balance to optimism. I love asking pessimists for their thoughts on my ideas. I learn quickly what might not work, or I get their contrarian perspective on human nature. You and I, the ones who believe there’s got to be something more to this thing called life, need to seek out the pessimists and learn their views while maintaining our realistic spirit.

2023-04-26    
Too half baked.

Do you ever struggle to translate the beautiful ideas in your head into words that others read? Like an out-of-control air traffic controller, you have too much idea traffic and you struggle to bring them into land. I am experiencing that feeling now. I find it helpful to write about it.It clears my head.Less noise.Clarity.

2023-04-25